Welcome to My Whirled

Pointing and laughing at life :Þ

Whirled News for July 9, 2010

Once again let’s throw a dart at the news page and see what kind of mayhem and idiocy is being wreaked upon this wacky world.

New York Whining

New Yorkers want us to think they are stalwart, tough and unassailable. If you believe that cow flop, have I got a deal for you.

New Yorkers are wimps. They whine about everything from a lone coyote in Central Park to not being able to buy an iPhone for a week. What horrible disaster did these Champions of the Human Spirit ™ withstand and overcome this week?

It was hot.

Did you know that, last summer, Texas had 62 straight days of triple-digit temperatures? Probably not, unless your life is so boring and empty that you actually watch the Weather Channel. But let the temperature in Manhattan rise above 90 and the media caterwauling would make you think the city was burning down. They cover it like it is Armageddon.

There are official statements and public appeals to help to check on the elderly so they can become more elderly. Shelters are opened, hydrants are turned on and the homeless are to told to cut down peeing on the sidewalks to avoid dehydration.

The rest of us are sick of your NY-ning. Shut up and drink iced tea like the rest of us.

Pussies.

Papal Arrogance

In a daring move, the Pope has decided to stiffen the rules against priests raping children. Evidently it has come to his attention that rape is bad. The Pontiff of Pedophilia has decreed that the priests who destroy kids’ innocence and scar them for life “will be held accountable.” And he broadened the church’s power to prosecute them

What makes the Catholic Church able to decide what laws it will adhere to? Why aren’t the cops dragging these priests out of the churches and hauling them to jail? They have time to punch teenage girls in the face and shoot handcuffed suspects so why not take care of a few child rapists while things are slow? Maybe we need to send Chris Hansen into churches dressed as a nun so he can help them out.

Why aren’t the Catholics demanding that something more be done? Hello, aren’t these your children getting assaulted? Are you really okay with sharing the collective guilt of what these priests are doing and the church is sanctioning?

Evidently god made hell so scary that his sycophants would rather see children be emotionally slaughtered than get kicked out of the church. Good job Jehovah.

Miscellany

In the finest tradition of Catholicism, one of its biggest Jew hating propagandists is also living above the law. Police are “investigating” Mel Gibson as an “alleged” suspect in a “potential” act of domestic violence with his ex-girlfriend as the “possible ” victim. What the hell is there to investigate? Did he hit her? Case closed, Sherlock. Put the Road Warrior in jail. Better yet, deport him to Israel.

I note that the oil spill is slipping off the media radar. We are hearing less about it every day. The story is getting tedious and is no longer generating revenue for the news outlets. I suppose it will go the way of the two wars our boys are dying in. It will be obscured by the much more important story of drunken druggy Lindsay Lohan going to jail.

And for the morons among you, stop leaving your dog in the car. Leave him at home where he won’t cook to death. If you have to take him with you, don’t go. Should you think it is okay to leave him locked in the car while you get your  nails filled, go sit in it with the windows up and the engine off for an hour or so.

Okay that’s it for this week. My psyche can’t handle anymore.

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